The Worst of Dramione
by L. C. Johnson
Summary: A series of Dramione parodies based on the many horrible fanfic stereotypes I've encountered prevalently over my years exploring Dramione fandom. Hopefully funny, most likely offensive, take with a grain of salt. This collection features Draco/Hermione
1. MarySue Hermione

Hello! The following is one of many parodies I've made of common horrible fanfiction scenarios. I basically was in a sardonic mood and decided to create replications of horrible, over-used plots in a number of fandoms I'm familiar with…These are intended to be satirical generalizations…They are not intended to be taken as a serious attempt at a story (and I hope no one would consider them to be), nor are they intended to "make fun of" or copy any one specific story. If you feel I've copied your story…I wouldn't want to admit it if I were you…After all, I'm making fun of the following ridiculous plot/characterization rampant in Dramione fandom. Furthermore, I am not making fun of the fandom itself (Dramione was my first, and has always been, my OTP).

In this case, because I've been in Dramione fandom for so long, I will be writing TONS of these for Dramione, and likely will group them all into the same fic, but each stereotype will be divided by a chapter, so if you find one particularly offensive it can be skipped. Of course if you want a much longer version of one of the worst Dramione fanfics ever written, AU and with names changed, of course, just go to your local bookstore and bye this hunk of paper masquerading as literature called _Twilight_.

That said, Harry Potter belongs to J. K. Rowling, and I do not claim any rights to it.

Enjoy! (Or hate, whichever.)

* * *

_Hermione Has Turned Into a Mary Sue, and All the Boys are Gorgeous Now Too_

It was going to be her seventh year at Hogwarts, and she was looking forward to it! Not for the books or classes, or ability to use magic...After all she was so smart she already knew everything that she could learn in school, and had figured out how to get away with using magic without the ministry knowing, and taught herself wandless magic, and how to speak to unicorns and mermaids. No, what she was really excited for was to see her two best friends again, and Ginny, who she'd become incredibly close to in the few summers they'd spent sharing a room, despite not really talking at school…Of course she hadn't seen any of them this summer though, so she was even more excited than she ordinarily would be, but she was a little afraid they wouldn't recognize her.

Her muggle cousin invited her to go stay with her in London for the whole summer, and decided that she needed to take Hermione under her wing. So she'd taken her shopping and taught her how to dress fashionably…Right now she was wearing tight hip-hugger skinny-jeans with a few well-placed rips in the knees, cute designer high-heeled sandals (because she was only 4'10"), an anklet that matched her cousin's, nails were painted bright red—they'd just gone to a salon a few days ago, where she'd also had acrylics put on her fingers, with little fake diamonds near the cuticle—big gold hoop earrings, a little pink baby top that showed off just a touch of cleavage and her stomach. She was wearing some mascara and lip-gloss but her cousin had insisted she didn't need much make up because the combination of growing into her own over the summer, how tan she'd gotten lying on the sandy warm beaches of California, where they had vacationed for a month because her cousin is actually from America, and the gorgeous highly realistic looking blonde streaks and a little hair growth spell they'd put in her hair, making it about three feet long, showed all her beauty naturally!

She fingered her belly-button ring, which had a little butterfly dangling from it, attracting attention to her flat, four-pack abs, absent mindedly as she walked through the barrier between platforms nine and ten. She should have been paying more attention to where she was going as she wandered out of the barrier though because she rammed into something hard, covered in black cloth, and the force was so great (even though she's only 4'10") that she caused the hard black thing to fall over, and she fell on top.

The first thing she noticed was that the thing she was laying on was very distinctly male, and had very nice abs and a broad strong chest, which her hands were all over. She was too shell-shocked to look up right away, and almost didn't want to once she heard his voice.

"Granger, is that you?"

It was Draco Malfoy. His voice was deeper though, and she definitely didn't remember him being so muscular. Finally she looked up, and he was gorgeous!

_No Hermione, he's not gorgeous! He's a horrible vile son of a death eater who has always called you Mudblood. You hate him._

_But he does apparently have nice abs now, all that quidditch practice did him well,_ A little voice that sounded suspiciously like it belonged to Ginny Weasley, whispered in the back of her mind.

_He's still an evil git! Yes, that's right, an evil git. Picking on Neville and making fun of Ron for being poor and calling me Mudblood…plus his dad is a death eater…he's definitely evil! Yes. _She scolded herself.

"Yes, it's me Malfoy, why?"

"Well," he smirked in a way that made her heart-flutter, even though she didn't understand why, "You just look different, the summer has been good to you."

She stared back into his beautiful silver eyes, and, before she could stop herself, replied, "To you too."

Her face turned scarlet and she scrambled off of him, _What is wrong with you 'Mione?_

Draco stood up and brushed himself off, she looked up at him…when had he gotten so tall? He must have been almost seven-feet tall, she barely came up to his ribs. It was both intimidating and strangely sexy. _No Hermione, you did not just think that!_

"Hey Malfoy, who are you harassing now?"

She turned around to see the two faces she'd missed all summer. She grinned and turned around to face them, excitedly yelling "Harry! Ron!"

She went to through her arms around them but realized they'd grown too…And gotten very handsome. Harry wasn't wearing his glasses either, maybe he'd gotten contacts? She didn't care at the moment though, she was suddenly mesmerized by his gorgeous emerald eyes, which were wide in shock as he recognized her.

" 'Mione is that you? You look…good…" Ron stammered, blushing hard.

"Oh don't be silly, I don't look that different…" She replied turning to face him. Ron had grown his hair out and grown a lot of muscle, he now looked more like an Abercrombie and Fitch model then the clueless boy next-door. She found herself blushing again, _You shouldn't think things like that Hermione! They're your best friends, and Draco Malfoy is your worst enemy! What's wrong with you?_

"Catch you later Granger," Malfoy said, sending a smirk her way that made her feel all funny inside.

"Shove off Malfoy!" Ron yelled after him.

"Forget him guys, let's go find a compartment," she said, smiling and pulling them toward the train.

The boys happily forgot about Malfoy and followed her, asking her all about her summer as they went. She answered their questions, but couldn't get the image of the now gorgeous Draco Malfoy—_Not gorgeous, evil!_—out of her mind.

* * *

After dinner that night Hermione was going down to the library to research some very advanced magical spells that she figured she'd learn just for fun and to get her mind off what had happened at dinner. Both Harry and Ron had decided to tell her they had feelings for her…And now she didn't know what to do. They were both her best friends and they were gorgeous, and she loved them…But she wasn't sure if she was in love with them. She had to think and clear her head. Of course, she still couldn't get the image of beautiful—_No, _evil—Draco Malfoy out of her head.

Just thinking about it was so distracting she'd lost track of where she was going, and had wandered down to the dungeons, she was about to turn around and head back when a hand reached out and grabbed the back of her shirt, pulling her into a dark alcove. She was so shocked she'd forgotten to yell.

"Hello Hermione," a deep husky voice whispered as strong masculine hands wrapped around her wrists and held them against the wall.

"Malfoy!" she whispered indigently, struggling a little bit, but realizing that there was nothing she could do to fight him off…after all he was so much bigger than her. _Wonder if he's big everywhere_, the pesky little voice whispered.

She blushed and tried to ignore the thought. Instead she opted for more talking, "What do you want?"

"Honestly?" he asked, his husky voice and musky scent sending shivers up and down her spine.

Something about the way he said it made her question whether or not she really wanted the answer…But she was a Gryffindor! She was no coward!

"Yes, honestly." She replied, he chin jutting up definitely toward him. Of course she realized a second too late that this put their lips only inches apart.

"You…" he whispered, and before she could respond he bent down, closed the distance between them, and claimed her lips with his own.

His lips were soft and he was a phenomenal kisser, and before she could stop herself, she leaned into him and moaned against his mouth. He licked her bottom lip begging for entrance and she opened her mouth automatically. He took the opportunity and deepened the kiss. She moaned again, and he let go of her wrists, wrapping his arms possessively around her waist, giving her the opportunity to wrap her arms around his neck, buring her hands in his long silky blond locks.

Finally they broke apart, gasping for air. She stared up into his gorgeous silver eyes, silently begging for more and begging for an explaination, "Why?..."

"Because I've been in love with you for a long time! I just was able to control it until I saw you today and I couldn't take it anymore, I had to have you!" He responded passionately, the truth of his words radiating in his eyes.

"Oh Draco, I…I think I love you too!" She cried, and he kissed her again!

Finally, minutes later, she broke away from him again, "But Draco, I have to know…Are you a death eater?"

"Never, my love! I couldn't bare the thought of someday having to hurt you."

"Does your father know?"

"No, but you returning my love has given me the courage to renounce him. You're all I need, Hermione!"

"Oh Draco," she sighed, tears of happiness welling up in her eyes. No words needed to be said, she leaned back in, pushing herself up on her tip toes, and kissed him again. His were the only lips she ever wanted to kiss for the rest of her life.

"Come with me…" He mumbled pulling her along the deserted corridor. She didn't know where they were going, and she didn't care. She trusted him completely; she was absolutely in love with him. Besides, she was the smartest most talented witch since Rowena Ravenclaw, nothing could hurt her!

He walked up to a painting and mumbled "Tour Jours Pur."

The painting swung aside, and revealed a hidden common room, covered in dark green, black and silver, with a picture of the Malfoy crest hanging above a fireplace filled with flickering green flames.

"It's a secret room my ancestor had built in Hogwarts generations ago just for the Malfoy family, no one knows about this place." He told her, leading her to a staircase.

Up the stairs was a beautiful, ornately decorated bedroom, still decorated in greens and blacks, with Malfoy paraphernalia everwhere. He lead her to a giant king-sized bed, it had a canopy and more pillows than she could count. He sat down on the edge and she followed, knowing she was ready for whatever might happen. After all, this was the man she loved.

"Please Hermione, I've craved you for so long, I don't want to wait another second to make love to you!" He proclaimed passionately, capturing her tiny hands in his large masculine hands.

Tears of joy sprung to her eyes and she smiled, nodded and crawled on top him, her legs wrapping around his waist as she kissed him passionately.

He pushed her robes aside and slid his hands up her shirt. She shivered under his touch. Her whole body ached for more, and she couldn't resist him. "Oh Draco, take me now!"

He smirked in that way that made her knees melt and pulled her shirt off, gently laying her against the bed. He continued kissing her as they removed each others clothing, not realizing how naked they'd become until he pulled off her bra and stared at her supple chest in wonder. Her eyes roamed down to the large throbbing bludlge in his silky black boxers. _Wow he's big! He's not going to fit in me_.

"You're beautiful Hermione." He told her, his eyes mirroring the awe in his voice.

She blushed, "So are you Draco."

His fingers brushed her panties, "Are you sure Darling?" He asked, his eyes searching hers, love and devotion conflicted by desperation and pure animalistic need.

"Yes," she gasped, her body automatically arching, desperate to be closer to his.

He kissed her again and ripped off her lacy red thong with one hand, throwing the scraps to the floor.

She pulled at the elastic of his boxers and gasped when she saw his long hard shaft. It was so big, and glorious and her body pulsed with desire just looking at it.

He looked up at her one more time, silently begging her reassurance one last time. She smiled and nodded, her whole being consumed with desire.

He kissed her and plunged into her. It hurt, he was huge, but only for a moment.

"Are you okay Love?" He whispered, going still against her. She could feel his whole body tremble as he tried to hold back.

"Yes, with you inside me I finally feel whole." She responded, tears in her eyes, she was overwhelmed by how good he felt inside of her, and how happy she felt.

He started to move again. The sweat and pleasure built between them. Their lips locked again, and soon she felt her whole body start to spasm and then she reached a peak of sweat glorious pleasure, it lasted forever, and he came with her, spilling is hot seed into her.

"I love you." He whispered, looking into her sparkling eyes as he flipped them over so she was on top.

"I love you too Draco," she replied, snuggling into his chest as sleep overcame her and his armed wrapped around her making her feel safer than she'd ever felt in her life.

As she fell asleep to the sound of his heart beat she knew they'd be together forever.

And they lived happily ever after. The end.

* * *

One more little disclaimer of sorts: If you are a young teenage girl and have read many fics like this…I cannot emphasize enough that in the real world you do not live happily ever after with a guy who has confessed his undying love for you at seventeen and then sleeps with you half an hour later. In the real world this usually only happens with large amounts of alcohol and in the morning a lot of embarrassed looks and, hopefully, "Well, yeah, good time I guess…See you at work later. Bye." At worst the scenario is the same except the dialogue goes more like, "Sorry, I don't remember who you are." Trust me. But I'm sure you all are smart enough to realize that anyway =)

~L.C.


	2. Evil Hermione

The Second installment of "The Worst of Dramione," featuring Voldemort referred to as "Daddy", Hermione dressing like a dominatrix, Blaise being a female the way he always was before HBP, Parseltongue and cheesy prophecies.

You've been warned. =)

* * *

_Evil!Hermione, Complete with Voldemort and Old-Fashioned Betrothals_

Hermione looked in the mirror, brushing her long, straight silky black hair, and debating between adding eyeliner to compliment her gold eyes. She would be seeing Draco tonight; it would be the first time since they'd gotten off the train at the end of their sixth year. It was unfortunate but she had to spend all summer with that disgusting Weasley family and whinny self-indulgent Harry Potter. This night was the only night she'd get with Draco before they had to go back to Hogwarts and she had to go back to being Hermione Granger. How she hated playing to know-it-all goody-two-shoes bookworm that was her cover! But it was necessary; after all, her father needed her.

She stood up and walked into her giant closet. It was decorated like most of her room, in deep greens and golds, with blood-hued red walls and ornate ancient mahogany furniture, with gorgeous portraits of the daughters of Slytherin who had lived in this room before her. She particularly got along with one of the portraits, her name was Amethyst, and she was Hermione's great-great aunt, but in the portrait she was only seventeen, the age all the daughters of the house of Slytherin were when their portraits were painted, usually right before their wedding…Hermione's would be painted at the end of the school year, when she would finally be free of those imbecile Gryffindors forever!

"Good evening Hermione, having trouble picking out something to wear for the party tonight?" Amethyst called from her portrait across the room.

"Yes, it's the first time I've seen Draco in so long; I want to look amazing for him!" She replied, thumbing through her collection of black lacy corsets…There were so many to choose from, and she'd have to match shoes too! She had at least narrowed it down to knowing she wanted blood-red to be laced somewhere into her outfit, it looked excellent on her and she knew it drove Draco mad.

"You could always see if Blaise would come over early, you know she's got an excellent eye for fashion!" Amethyst replied. She was always so helpful, Hermione was quite glad to have her around for advise at times…And of course she always was willing to listen to her rants about those morons who thought she was their best friend.

"She's still in France visiting her fiancé, and her parents are forcing her to spend the entire week getting to know him. Of course she hates it dreadfully, but he is an excellent match, and maybe in time she'll come to like him." And she really hoped she would, after all Blaise had been her best friend since they were introduced at the age of five, at her mother's wedding…Blaise had been excited she was getting a Daddy, after all, she was only a year old when hers died. They'd hid under tables and stole treats and told Draco he couldn't play with them because it was girls only time. They'd loved each other ever since.

Amethyst giggled, "Well Hermione, not everyone can be as lucky as you, after all Draco is quite the catch. He's only the richest, most handsome pureblood bachelor in all of England!"

Hermione smiled privately to herself, glad Amethyst couldn't see her. "Well, I really just got lucky, we've been betrothed since birth, there was no way our parents could have known we'd fall so madly in love with each other."

"Oh, I wouldn't say that…" Amethyst replied, in a way that made Hermione think the portrait knew more than she was letting on.

"What?" She frowned.

"Oh nothing," her great-great Aunt sighed, "I'm due for tea with Mathilda Malfoy anyway, and you know how she can't stand anyone being late. She's still stuck in the Victorian era."

"Literally," Hermione replied sarcastically, pretending to drop the subject. She'd ask her father about it later though. Slytherin was deep in her blood and she always found out what she wanted to know. She was deeply cunning both by breeding and training, and she'd had excellent practice the last six years pretending to be a mudblood, house-elf loving Gryffindor. She was so good that at eleven she'd convinced the sorting hat that's really what she was. She couldn't hide certain things from the hat, but she could cover others up with fake thoughts and memories like thinking of the disguise her house elves had used to pretend to be her parents when they'd gone shopping in Diagon Alley for her school books, and flashes of the muggle world she'd seen while traveling, forcing them to the top of her mind, like it was the world she belonged to.

She smiled and pulled out a corset, she'd finally found the perfect one! Deep blood-red with black lace on top of it, black silk ribbons lacing it in the back and the Slytherin crest pinned so it would rest right at the center of her ample flawless cleavage. She had the perfect dress too! It was long black, hugged all of her curves, was tight down her legs, and had string straps. The top would be almost entirely concealed by the coarsest, but it was sure to drive Draco insane!

She'd just finished applying her dark-red lipstick when there was a knock on her double Louis XIV style doors.

"Come in!" she called, not looking away from her vanity, still trying to decide whether or not her eyes looked smoky enough.

"Hello Dearest," her father said, walking up behind her and putting his long thin hands on her shoulders, smiling as he looked at her reflection in the mirror. "You look beautiful my Dear."

"Thank you Daddy," she replied, turning around to face him. His sharp eyes were gold today like hers, that meant he was in a good mood, which was excellent because that would make it easier for her to get out of him what Amethyst was talking about.

"Are you excited for tonight my Peach?" He asked.

"Of course, it will be the official announcement of my betrothal to Draco, and he'll finally take his place among your officers! I'm so proud of him! And of course you too Daddy," she responded, smirking in a way befitting her Slytherin ancestors.

"Thank you Darling. And I am proud of you. You've done excellently these past years as my spy. I couldn't have trusted anyone but my own daughter with the mission." He told her, beaming with pride.

"Well you really have Lucius to thank, after all he made sure to tell me all about your great work and how important you were and how proud I should be to have you as my father while you had to be away."

Yes, Lord Voldemort was her father. She had always known who her father was thanks to Lucius and Narcissa who had taken her in as a baby and raised her as their own alongside their only child, Draco, after her father had been weakened and forced into hiding. They'd also told her all about what had happened to her father at the pinnacle of his power, and how important it was that the boy who nearly killed him be destroyed. Until her father was able to regain his strength they would need someone close to the boy, someone he trusted, able to take him out at the opportune moment, or at least pass information about him on to her father, their Lord and Master, once he'd come back. No one knew about her outside of Voldemort's inner circle, and Lucius could use his connections in the ministry and his magic in the muggle world to create a fake identity for her, he even found a way to get past the ancient magic that recorded a magical child's real name at birth in the Hogwarts registry! And of course she was sure to be as cunning and brilliant as her father had been, so she was an ideal candidate for the mission. When he'd explained it to her the summer before she and Draco left for their first year of Hogwarts she'd wanted to do it! Been proud to do it! To one day help her father again rise to power and beat his arch nemesis!

"Yes, Lucius has been excellent as my right hand. He raised you better than anyone besides myself could have, he and Narcissa were excellent guardians to you…And I'm glad that being raised with Draco served to make you two closer than we ever imagined. Although, I must admit, I was a bit afraid that it might make you see him more like your brother than as a future husband."

She had to hold back a grin, and hoped he didn't notice the little diabolical gleam in her eye; this was the perfect chance to ask! She remembered to reinforce the barriers around her mind, so that no hint of why she was asking leaked out, and grabbing her brush to run it through her hair again, replied, "I could never think of Draco as my brother, even if we did share a crib and grow up in the same house! But is there any reason we wouldn't be close?"

"On the contrary, there is every reason you should be close to each other," he told her, looking away, as if into a memory.

"Oh…" She hadn't expected that response. She continued brushing her hair, careful to only sound mildly interested.

"You see Hermione, you're going to be seventeen soon, legally an adult in our world and your betrothal to Draco is to be announced tonight, so I think you have a right to know…" He trailed off and began pacing the room, his footsteps light but footprints on the ornate Persian carpet large—her father was tall but thin man.

"When you and Draco were only babies Lucius, Narcissa and I did not simply betroth you…The stars had aligned perfectly at your times of birth and a seer made a prophecy about two babies to be born when the two of you were…"

She gasped, putting her silver Slytherin-crested brush down, fully turning to face him. He didn't look up, seemingly lost in his own memory.

"The prophecy stated that two children would be born in the same year to the leader of the dark revolution and one of his most powerful followers. Those two children, if united in mind body and soul when they reached their eighteenth year would have a power so great between them they would successfully finish the work of their fathers and create a new empire under them…" He looked directly at her now, his eyes glowing red with passion and determination again, "And you and Draco are those children."

"Are you sure Daddy?" She gasped, intrigued, alarmed and excited by the news. She couldn't wait to tell Draco, and she could wait to see the look on that cow Pansy Parkinson's face when the prophecy came to pass—the ugly little bimbo thought she and Draco should have been the one's betrothed at birth, and never understood why his parents had him betrothed so some mysterious girl with no known pedigree. Of course, it just wasn't known to her family because they weren't in the Dark Lord's inner circle.

"Yes. And as a result we performed special ancient betrothal rituals on the two of you when you were babies…We couldn't risk you ever falling in love with someone else."

"What?" She gasped, standing up and spinning around to face him…She was the only person in the whole world who ever dared to raise her voice to him, after all he was the most powerful dark wizard since Salazar Slytherin himself, "Are you saying we aren't really in love with each other?"

"No," he replied, "The love between you is real, and seeing as to how beautiful you are, I'd imagine the attraction is as well, the ritual only made it so you would never be attracted to anyone else. If you did not love each other it would simply be a matter of lust, but if you love each other, it is true love. Although, given the nature of the prophecy, and knowing each other your whole lives it is no shock to me that you love each other very deeply. And of course, I wouldn't want anything more for you than to be happy, married to a rich powerful promising young pureblood wizard anyway."

"Well, as long as the love between us is real…Does Draco know Daddy?" She asked, her heart pounding, her mind riddled with new information, although, like a true woman of Slytherin, she showed no outward emotion.

"I've told Lucius to inform the boy tonight, before the proceedings…Shall I leave you to finish getting ready now?" He smirked, "I need to finish up with the lowly muggles in the dungeons before we go tonight anyway; you know how I hate leaving messes to come home to."

"Of course Daddy," she replied, walking back into her closet. She heard him close the door a moment later, and she let out a sigh. She was so shocked by this new information. She wanted to research it in the Slytherin library, but knew she wouldn't have time between the party tonight and having to go back to school tomorrow. She'd just have to have the books disguised and sent to her at Hogwarts.

She snapped her fingers and a moment later an ugly, wrinkly, but hopelessly devoted house elf named Mitsy appeared, she'd been Hermione's since birth and loved her mistress more than life itself, just like a good house elf.

"Mitsy," she greeted, not looking at her, but instead digging around for a quill and a spare bit of parchment, "I need you to find all the books you can about betrothal ceremonies and any mention of prophecies concerning babies and the dark empire, disguise them and send them to me at Hogwarts."

A moment later she handed the elf the parchment, "I've written down the instructions again on here in case you need it for reference."

"Of course Mistress!" the elf squeaked happily, bowing before she disappeared with a pop.

"Now," Hermione said to herself, combing her fingers through her long silky black hair, "I've got to find jewelry still…I really wish Blaise was here to help."

Jewelry wasn't quite as challenging as she feared though, mostly thanks to being raised by a gorgeous fashioneista like Narcissa Malfoy. Ten minutes later she was decked in ancient expensive gold and platinum necklaces, rings, earrings and bracelets, all intricately designed especially for the women in the house of Slytherin, and engraved with their crest.

"_How do I look Nigina?_" She hissed in Parseltongue, as her baby snake slithered across her feet, wrapping around her leg lovingly.

"_Beautiful Mistress, so dark and evil…I'm almost ready to shiver out of my skin again!_" The emerald creature said, her deep intelligent eyes glowing in the torch light.

"_Thank you Nigina, that's perfect. But you aren't due to shed soon…You're feel alright aren't you? You've been hunting enough with your mother?_" She asked, concerned for Nigina's growth…She was big for her age, but babies always had to be taken care of and her mother, Nagini, was so often out helping her father that sometimes she wasn't around to keep as much of an eye on Nigina as she'd like to.

"_Yesssss Hermione, I'm perfectly happy…Perhapsss I'll find some muggle children to play with while you are gone._"

"_Alright, just make sure not to swallow more than you can handle at once._"

"_Never,_" Nigina whispered, as she slithered through her little hole in the closet, off to check with her mother before going out to play, undoubtedly.

Hermione smiled and decided it was time for her to go too. Checking herself in the mirror one last time before she left, she decided she would use a bit of extra eyeliner to accentuate her sparkling golden eyes.

* * *

Hermione arrived at Malfoy Manor exactly five minutes past her expected arrival time, as Narcissa had taught her, a desirable witch in society is always just late enough to let the gossip about her get going so everyone's attention is entirely on her when she does arrive.

She slowly walked down the giant ornate stairway into the ballroom, which was brightly lit and decorated with white pixies along the high-ceiling, creating a magical glow. The light reflected off of her tanned skin (she was also half Egyptian, although she'd never known her mother…Only that she'd been a powerful pureblood witch from an ancient family. And blood was all that mattered when it came to breeding of course, race was a silly old-fashioned thing to be bigoted about. Biracial children certainly weren't the same as half-bloods!) and her eyes glowed as they landed upon the adoring silver pair staring up at her from the bottom of the staircase.

"Draco," she greeted, slipping her hand into his and letting him help her down the last few steps. The whole room around them disappeared as she gazed up at him, and he back at her.

"Did your father tell you?" She asked, desperately searching his eyes for any sign that the beautiful man in front of her might feel differently about her somehow.

"Yes, but it doesn't change a thing Mia, I've loved you my whole life, it's not just lust from a spell." He told her, looking at her so intensely that she felt her knees grow weak. He was the only one who had such an effect on her, no one else could make the Princess of Darkness so much as bat an eye, but her soul mate, destined for her by prophecy, and betrothed to her since birth, could turn her to jelly with just a look!

Luckily he'd wrapped his arms around her waist securely, and automatically steadied her. "Are you alright, Mia?"

"Yes, I'm just happy to hear you say that. Of course I never really thought that would be the only cause of the bond between us." She replied, smiling genuinely up at him. He'd called her Mia again! She loved it when he used pet names for her! He was the only one allowed to and it made her feel dirty whenever the Weasel called her 'Mione.

"No, nothing!" He replied and kissed her passionately.

A moment later she broke away from him, "Draco, remember where we are!"

"I know Mia," he signed, "It's just been so long since I've seen you, and we'll barely get any time together once school starts, with those oafs constantly with you."

"I know its hard Drake, but it's only one more year." She replied, looking pleadingly up at him, silently begging him to understand and forgive her for having to be away from him. Of course she knew he understood, and she knew what she was doing was important for the greater good, and for her father, but it was still so hard for her to be away from him!

"I know Mia, I can't wait until the summer when we can get married and finally be together forever!" He whispered passionately, sweeping her up in his arms.

"You know they mean nothing to me, don't you Drake?" She whispered, knowing he needed to hear it…After all, she was such a good actress she almost fooled him sometimes.

"Yes, it's just so hard to see you, with all those glamour spells, laughing with them, them being able to talk to you, and Merlin forbid sometimes even hug you, while I have to scowl and pretend to hate you. Sometimes I just want to punch that disgusting Weasel in the face for daring to look at you the way he does!"

"I know Drake…So let's just enjoy this one night before we have to go back to that ridiculous excuse of a school." She sighed.

"Of course," he smiled, took a step back, bowed and said loudly, "Would the most beautiful witch in the room do me the honor of sharing a dance with me?"

She blushed, and hoped no one noticed Slytherin's youngest heir looking like a silly love struck girl, as she took his hand and allowed him to lead her out onto the dance floor.

Later that night their betrothal would officially be announced—Draco Malfoy to marry the mysterious Hermione Riddle, as she was known by all of those except the few Death Eaters closest of her father. Then tomorrow she would have to don the glamour spells that turned her into a mousy-haired brown-eyed bookworm of a mudblood girl, go back to pretending to hate her fiancé and everything she knew to be true, and stomach the two loser red-heads and moronic Gryffindor golden-boy she pretended to love. For now though, she could just be Hermione, Princess of Darkness, heir to her father's dream, and future wife to the man she'd loved all her life, Draco Malfoy.

* * *

When the end of the school year came and the long awaited battle between Harry Potter and Lord Voldemort finally arrived, Hermione retained her cover until the very last second she could. Ron was about to hurt Draco, and she couldn't let that happen.

"Avada Kedavra!" She shouted, pointing her wand at the red-head before he was able to finish casting his spell against Draco.

"Why—" he began, surprise and hurt in his eyes as life left him. Draco smirked, and she ran over to him to help him up.

"Behind you," he warned, before silently casting a protection spell around them.

"Hermione!" Harry yelled, anguish in his voice, surprise splattered across his face, "Why? Why did you save Malfoy, how could you?"

Hermione smirked, pointed her wand at herself and whispered the counter curse to her glamour spells. Her eyes changed back to their natural gold, her skin darkened, and her hair grew out, going straight and ebony as the spell flowed off of it.

Harry gasped and she laughed in response, "Potter you idiot. My name is really Hermione Riddle!"

"Riddle? Like…" He trailed off clearly unable to believe it. Draco stood up fully beside her, and wrapped his arm possessively around her waist, she could picture the smirk on his face—it mirrored hers perfectly.

"Yes Potter, Lord Voldemort is my father." She laughed manically, dark power radiating around her. "And Draco is my fiancé, together we're destined to build an empire in which purebloods rule over the muggle and mudblood filth that pollute this world, returning the world to the natural order of things."

"But, but you were my friend!" He replied, clearly confused.

She laughed again, "You really are stupid aren't you? I was never your friend! I just pretended to get close to you, biding my time until my father rose back to power! And now, it's time for you to die!"

She flicked her wand, a cold determined smirk present on her blood red lips, her tight black robes billowing around her, "Avada Kedavra!"

And just like that Harry Potter fell, nothing without Hermione Granger by his side. With their hero down, the foolish muggle-lovers were quickly defeated and a new era run by the Dark Lord Voldemort, and destined to be succeeded by his daughter, the future Dark Lady, was ushered in.

* * *

Not long after the battle Draco and Hermione got married in the palace they would one day rule in. They had lots of evil babies and lived happily ever after in their new evil world.

The end.

* * *

Real World Disclaimer: I do not recommend getting married when you are 18, and if you do I definately advise against having babies for at least ten years. I also do not think any father, even Lord Voldemort, would approve of the clothes Hermione was wearing, so don't try to get away with it around your father! =)


End file.
